Hey JAZZY JEFF!!!!
Man, I love your work with The Fresh Princeof Bel-Air! Any chance of a comeback tour?
Anyhow, I'd be delighted to help you out with inflicting tattoos on your Solid Gold Dancers. Inflicting tattoos on 20 people is no problem for me because of my specialized training in the dark arts of Mooseknuckling. I'm sure you don't know what a Mooseknuckleis but if you'd like, I could introduce you to my Mooseknuckle collection and we could go from there. Mooseknuckle handling is a high level of tattoo inflicting in my circle of friends.
Now if you are really interested in pressing forward your VISA to my domain (I've only just now started to accept VISA, nobody pays for anything in American Express these days) allow me to rub my Mooseknuckle and address some of your queries...
1) Because of my dark arts training, to which I've eluded to in a previous paragraph of this domain pressing, it might take me about 3 minutes to inflict each tattoo per Solid Gold Dancer.
2) The cost of each tattoo is doing just fine, thanks for asking. I think he was a little upset the other day but Canada winning gold for men's hockey really cheered him up!
3) Our studio is exactly in a brick building, down by the train tracks. It's pretty deep in the building, so bring a snack.
4) Fo 20 peeps? Fo sho my Fo bich Niga!
Now one last thing before you forward your VISA to my domain...
I'm currently stuck in Nigeria, working for a very wealthy Nigerian prince. His money is tied up in a government bank and I need to help him release his money to a foreign account. I trust that you are a good business associate, willing to help out a needy sovereign prince God bless you Jesus Christ our Savior. I would like to forward you a check for $20,000,000 in escrow, however bank transfer fees require a security deposit of $10,000 to initiate the wire transfer. If, bless Jesus Christ our most holy of Mooseknuckles, you could help facilitate this exchange of funds, I have been authorized by his Holiness the Prince of Nigeria to entitle you to 15% of the total assets of the $20,000,000 in question.
I look forward to your reply!