Abbott and Costello now days.
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Thread: Abbott and Costello now days.

  1. #1
    Ridin hard n dirty Array Mr.Sushi ya ha's Avatar
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    May 2005
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    Abbott and Costello now days.

    You have to be old enough to remember Abbott and Costello, and too old to REALLY understand computers, to fully appreciate this. For those of us who sometimes get flustered by our computers, please read on...

    If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch, 'Who's on First?' might have turned out something like this:

    ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

    COSTELLO: Thanks I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer.

    ABBOTT: Mac?

    COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.

    ABBOTT: Your computer?

    COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.

    ABBOTT: Mac?

    COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.

    ABBOTT: What about Windows?

    COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?

    ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?

    COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?

    ABBOTT: Wallpaper.

    COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

    ABBOTT: Software for Windows?

    COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?

    ABBOTT: Office.

    COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

    ABBOTT: I just did.

    COSTELLO: You just did what?

    ABBOTT: Recommend something.

    COSTELLO: You recommended something?

    ABBOTT: Yes.

    COSTELLO: For my office?

    ABBOTT: Yes.

    COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?

    ABBOTT: Office.

    COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!

    ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.

    COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?

    ABBOTT: Word.

    COSTELLO: What word?

    ABBOTT: Word in Office.

    COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.

    ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.

    COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?

    ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue 'W'.

    COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue 'w' if you don't start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?

    ABBOTT: Money.

    COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?

    ABBOTT: Money.

    COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?

    ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.

    COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer?

    ABBOTT: Money.

    COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?

    ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.

    COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?

    ABBOTT: One copy.

    COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?

    ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.

    COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?

    ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!

    (A few days later)

    ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

    COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

    ABBOTT: Click on 'START'.............
    Remembering Bill Mclean.
    Having had a colonoscopy......I have now seen where the sun don't shine......(Me)
    Cancer Sucks!!!

  2. #2
    hanging out at timmies Array
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    posing with one of my zukes at 7/11
    a suzisomething
    thats funny

  3. #3
    corner worker Array solo soldier's Avatar
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    Where no one can find me!
    I need more room in the shop!
    If there was a way to reward you for that post I would!
    Thank you (as I wipe the tears out of my eyes).

  4. #4
    Registered User Array CanadianBird's Avatar
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    FWITSW, I remember these guys and others.

  5. #5
    Riff Raff Array Leslie0568's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by solo soldier View Post
    If there was a way to reward you for that post I would!
    Thank you (as I wipe the tears out of my eyes).
    Shut up and get naked

  6. #6
    Registered User Array Frank Einstein's Avatar
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    Well done!
    My brain is the same shape as my hat!

  7. #7
    Insert User Title Here. Array TripleTime's Avatar
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    Apr 2009
    Spinning right round baby right round.
    Here's another one - I'm sure there must be some "The Two Ronnies" fans out there.....same idea as the one above.

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