For the Computer Techs Out There...
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Thread: For the Computer Techs Out There...

  1. #1
    Angel Girl

    For the Computer Techs Out There...

    This is a true story from the WordPerfect Helpline which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say, the Help Desk employee was fired however, he is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for Termination without Cause." This is the actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee.

    "Rich Hall computer assistance; may I help you?"
    "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
    "What sort of trouble?"
    "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
    "Went away?"
    "They disappeared."
    "Hmmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
    "It's a blank; it won' t accept anything when I type."
    "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
    "How do I tell?"
    "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"
    "What's a sea-prompt?"
    "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"
    "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
    "Does your monitor have a power indicator?"
    "What's a monitor?"
    "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"
    "I don't know."
    "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"
    "Yes, I think so."
    "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall."
    "Yes, it is."
    "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"
    "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
    "Okay, here it is."
    "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
    "I can't reach."
    "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"
    "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"
    "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle it's because it's dark."
    "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."
    "Well, turn on the office light then."
    "I can't."
    "No? Why not?"
    "Because there's a power failure."
    "A power.......a power failure?.... Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now.Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"
    "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
    "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."
    "Really? Is it that bad?"
    "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
    "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"
    "Tell them you're too fucking stupid to own a computer."

  2. #2
    Medium Pimpin' Array ORYX's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    White Rock
    A red one
    Haha, I feel for the tech support guy.
    Originally posted by adamantium
    I'm going to type this slowly so that you folk can follow along.
    Quote Originally Posted by CHIA View Post
    I agree with you about the internet, it's probably here to stay.

  3. #3
    no brand loyalty..... Array 01gixxerjim's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    I like GSX-R's
    unfu**in' believable, LOL!!!
    Another Day...Another Project...

  4. #4
    as said before,

    Last decade called, they want this joke back too.


  5. #5
    01000110 01010101 Array orbit's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2002
    XR650R Sumo

  6. #6
    I do all my own stunts Array boarder's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    only 1 bike now, '02 gsxr750
    I gotta tech support story that happened to me.
    Me"Netlink Computers, how can I help you?"
    "The windows product key you sold me doesn't work, I need a new one"
    "Ok, you just typed it in wrong, clear it out and try again"
    "uh no, i didn't, it doesn't work"
    "Just type it in again, I'm sure it will work"
    "I didn't make the mistake, Microsoft screwed up, give me a new key"
    "YOU STILL THERE!???!!"
    "Ya sorry about that, it turns out that there's a problem with windows in which, although you typed the key in right, windows thinks it's wrong. To fix the problem, just clear the spaces out and re-type the key. Microsofts been working on the problem for a couple of months now ....cough cough"
    "Stupid Microsoft....hey it works! thanks man"

  7. #7
    Wow, how dumb.

  8. #8
    Rageaholic Array Jayson's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2002
    Canon 1ds3 1d4
    i coudl have totlaly done that while i worked at dowco
    omfg lol

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