What do you mean by COMMUNITY (BCSB?)
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Thread: What do you mean by COMMUNITY (BCSB?)

  1. #1

    Question What do you mean by COMMUNITY (BCSB?)

    I have just finished reading some posts about people
    deciding not to go to Rudy's funeral.

    I was present with perhaps less than 10 bcsb members.
    I don't know how many people went to the Nanaimo one,
    but I felt very disappointed at the lack of support today in Tsawwasen.

    I'm not sure if it is perhaps a cultural thing- but even though
    I didn't know Rudy or let alone meet him, I felt that it was
    important that I payed my respects and "showed face" to him.

    As he was a member of the same "community" I felt that reason was enough to attend his funeral to pay respects.

    I take a lot from this community, and I don't think it would be right to only participate at certain times.

    I understand that maybe a lot less people from this site met Rudy-but a fellow rider is still a fellow rider.

    I thought that if we laughed together that we would also cry together....

    my 2c.

  2. #2
    Registered User Array
    Join Date
    Jul 2002
    some people might have had prior commitments, another thing might be, that funerals are an incredibly tough thing to attend - community or not.

    good for you for doing your part. As some others have mentioned, many have their own way of doing 'their' part too.

  3. #3
    Balgony, not Bologna! Array TonyBalgony's Avatar
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    Jul 2002
    White Dragon-
    I hear what your saying and understand your disappointment.

    Although I did not personally know Rudy I went to the Swan today and picked up a couple of RAZ decals.
    I will put them on my bike and it will be a constant reminder of Rudy and his love for sportbikes.
    Maybe it will make me slow down, maybe it will make me think twice about not wearing gear, maybe it will just make me think.

    What I do know is everytime I get on my bike it will remind me of Rudy, a fellow BCSB member who loved to ride and how quickly things can go wrong.

    Since the first post regarding Rudy came up, not one day has gone by when I do not think of him and the family that is now without him.
    Last edited by TonyBalgony; 05-24-2003 at 11:53 PM.
    Stop Rappin' Man,
    this is the REAL thing.

  4. #4
    I was there,black jeans,brown shirt.Couldn`t bring myself to sit in the pews,so I sat in the foyer instead.

    I was in the foyer when three guys came in with motorcycle gear and helmets,you could just barely hear an audible gasp from the others.

    I shed a few tears when Rudys brother in law did his speech,it was tough.

  5. #5
    Administrator Array adamantium's Avatar
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    Feb 2002
    I wish.
    I didn't go today.

    I thought long and hard about it, and had a number of discussions with my wife on the matter. It was a very tough decision for me, but I felt in the end that having not known him personally, or even having met him - that I would provide nothing. I spoke with Rudy's wife on the phone, and have offered all the services I can to her. Funerals are an interesting thing - and everyone deals with them differently.
    BCSB- Administrator

  6. #6
    Wanderer of the Wastes Array DNAspark99's Avatar
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    Apr 2002
    השטן שב
    It's about communication and connections, not communism and communities.
    "I dread beyond all else the growth of the petty tyranny of restrictive legislation, the transference of disciplinary authority from the judiciary to the constabulary, the abandonment of every constitutional safeguard of individual liberty."

  7. #7
    Registered User Array Dalton's Avatar
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    Feb 2002
    I like my
    k7 gsxr 600
    I didn't know him, but I still kept him and his family in my thoughts.
    BCSB- Moderator

  8. #8
    I wanted to go at first but after hearing other people's opinions, I felt that there are more suitable thing for a stranger like me to do rather than attending the more personal funeral, ie a memorial ride.

  9. #9
    ...... Array Team Green 9R's Avatar
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    Aug 2002
    A memorial ride sounds like a good idea.......going to a funeral for a person I dont even know .......sorry. I feel terrible for his family, and like Tony said "not one day goes by that I dont think of him and the family that is now without him"

    RIP Rudy

  10. #10
    bastardizer Array HotWheels's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    none, till the boys are older
    As mentioned in a previous post, we all deal with mortality differently. It's a hard reality because it is so close for each of us.
    When it's a situation like this, where it concerns people we don't know, it becomes a difficult decision to go or not to go.

    I personally feel both disappointed and relieved. I am disappointed to the fact that I was the only rider w/ bike that showed up to the Swan, but I am also relieved that other bikes/riders did actually show up to the services. I didn't want to be the only member on a bike showing up to the services, out of respect to the family. But we cannot criticize people for their actions when it deals with a topic like this.

    Yes, we are a community and yes there are some of us that are on the outskirts of this community. I would not want anyone to feel obligated to attend my services. This has become a touchy subject on the grounds that we may be placing ourselves in a similar situation in our minds and that we wouldn't want to go out with out a last ride. (A memorial ride is an awsome idea).
    I believe that whan we go, we want to leave a lasting impression and the our lives made an impact on others in a positive way.

    When I think of a 'community' I think of the defined term.
    -a number of people having common ties or interests and living in the same place and subject to the same laws
    This (I believe) accurately describes the sportbike world. The only thing I would add to that is, that those people are a tight knit group of individuals allowed to make personal decisions and not be chastised.
    On my ride home in the rain, from The Swan, I was thinking of how the police community comes out in droves when a member passes, as do firefighters. I do not want to belittle any group or elevate another, but I think our community has the same focus and closeness.

    That's just me.

    R.I.P Rudy
    "...than I'll be done and we can dance.."

  11. #11
    Registered User Array matthew's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Originally posted by AliMouse
    I wanted to go at first but after hearing other people's opinions, I felt that there are more suitable thing for a stranger like me to do rather than attending the more personal funeral, ie a memorial ride.
    dido.......i would have liked to have gone ...even not ever meeting him......but i thought about how someone sugested doin a ride for him ............that felt a little more fitting for someone in my position and how i felt about it.
    BUT.......i do agree with your opinion (WHITE DRAGON). it is a very good one. i'll leave on that note.

  12. #12
    Deer magnet Array Prez's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    sold - borrowing my wife's CBR
    I posted this in another thread, but it seems relevant here too.


    I went to Ethan's funeral two years ago - not on a bike. I had known him for around a year, and was on a ride with him a few day's before his crash.

    I thought about going to Corey's funeral, but I felt strange going to a service for someone I had never met.

    I went to Rudy's funeral, but again, not on a bike. I didn't know him well, but on MM, we spent a good twenty minutes or so chatting etc. I had first met him last year on a ride.


    I agree with some of the other posts that a memorial ride is a better way to mourn the loss of a fellow rider, rather than showing up at a funeral full of close friends and family.
    Every day I break my previous record of consecutive days still alive.

  13. #13
    BBQ Squadron Member Array Dark()Knight's Avatar
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    Jul 2002
    BatCave in Van
    Sorry to hear that you were disappointed WhiteDragon. I also was unable to attend as I had my son that day and thought it would be improper to bring him to such an event. I did pass on my condolences to Flyin Busa to Rudy's family and did my part to donate to the BC Cancer Society. Having personally lost someone to cancer I thought best to donate to one of his charieties. May he rest in peace.
    Be Happy for this moment.... This moment is your life.

    It is not about Anger,
    It's about Peace.
    It is not about Power,
    It's about Grace.
    It is not about knowing your enemy,
    It's about knowing yourself.

  14. #14
    Just Another Enthusiast Array vrecksler's Avatar
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    Feb 2002
    Naked SV
    Even with Corey, whom I knew fairly well, I did not feel comfortable going to his funeral. I personally do not like funerals and do not feel attendance is necessary to validate my feelings or demonstrate support to the remaining family.

    With Rudy, a person who I have never met or really noticed his posts, I would feel very out of place and would rather pay him respects by reminding myself of the dangers of riding so I do not end up joining him. If he was part of BCSB then chances are he was a great guy as the majority of people here are, and I hope this will be the last loss for our community this season.

    B-r-a-d-l-e-y...Why? Because I'm Bradley!


  15. #15
    A funeral is a place for people to say goodbye to someone they love, it's as simple as that.

    If you want to see 'community' and a 'show of solidarity', that is what memorials and wakes are for.

    I remember feeling very uncomfortable at my grandparents' funerals with all the people who were there just 'to be there'. It was kind of them to take time out of their day to attend, but that's all it was to them, an obligation.

    "That service was so touching"...you know, 'touching' like a Hallmark card.

    When all was said and done, it really meant nothing to them. It was just an obituary in the paper, a stone on the lawn. It didn't make me feel any better having them there, I couldn't have cared less if there were three-hundred more people there.

    I was embarrassed to be crying in front of these strangers, and as much as I appreciated the sentiment, I didn't want them to pat me on the shoulder and give me their rehearsed trivialities.

    I would feel equally uncomfortable going to the funeral of someone I did not care for deeply.

    But maybe that's just me. :/
    Last edited by Ivy; 05-25-2003 at 07:44 PM.

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