seeing as jokes pop up on here from time to time (made man, bandito, etc) i figured why not have one spot to share some funnies. this isn't hdb so a modicum of decorum is expected.
DON'T STUFF THE CAGERS!
Good joke, but it bugs me when people re-write jokes (always making them shittier). Not pointing fingers at you, syncro, but at whoever rewrote that from the original.
"Yamaha" - it's Japanese for "fuck your sports car."
Last edited by FASTn50; 12-18-2014 at 02:05 PM.
All my Mistresses have two round, sticky black feet and are Made in Japan or Germany!
If I die on Phillip Island, so what! I'm already in Heaven! WOOHOOO!!!
So what's the funnier original joke?
And just to throw in a clean one,
A proud new father sits down with his dad to have a drink.
"Well son, now that you have a son of your own its time I gave you something."
"Dad you dont mea-"
"Yes I do. You've earned it." Says the father as he passes a copy of '1001 Dad Jokes 5th Edition' to the son.
"Dad I dont know what to say...I'm honored."
"Hi honored," Replies the father. "I'm dad."
Fill the house with bees.
An older man walked into a jewelry store one Friday evening with a beautiful young woman at his side. He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend. The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000.00 ring.
The man said, 'No, I'd like to see something more special.' At that statement, the jeweler went to his special stock and brought another ring over.
'Here's a stunning ring at only $40,000.00' the jeweler said. The young lady's eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with excitement.
The man seeing this said, 'We'll take it.'
The jeweler asked how payment would be made and the man said, 'By check. I know you need to make sure my check is good, so I'll write it now and you can call the bank Monday to verify the funds and I'll pick the ring up Monday afternoon,' he said.
Monday morning, the jeweler phoned the older man.
'There's no money in that account.'
'I know,' said the old man, 'But let me tell you what a great weekend I had!'
A Police STOP at 2 AM
An guy is stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and asked where he's going at this time of night.
The guy replies, "I'm on my way to a lecture about staying out late, smoking and alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body."
The officer then asks, "Really? Who's giving that lecture at this time of night?"
The man replies, "My wife."
I landed in Montreal airport,
I asked someone:
"What's the fastest way downtown ? "
She asked me:
"Are you walking or driving ? "
" I'm driving "
She then said:
" that is the fastest way"
R.I.P #48 Shoya Tomizawa (December 10, 1990 – September 5, 2010)
R.I.P. #58 Marco Simoncelli (January 20, 1987 – October 23, 2011)
Adam was walking around the Garden of Eden feeling very lonely, so God asked Adam, "What is wrong with you?"
Adam said, "Lord, I don't have anyone to talk to."
God said, "Then I will give you a companion, and she will be called a 'woman'. This person will cook for you and wash your clothes, she will always agree with every decision you make. She will bear your children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them. She will not nag you, and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you've had a disagreement. She will never have a headache, and will freely give 'love' and compassion whenever needed. She will never question your behaviour or the company you keep. She will support you and understand that you have important decisions to make throughout your life and don't have time for nonsense..."
Adam asked God, "What will this woman cost?"
God said, "An arm and a leg..."
Adam said, "What can I get for just a rib?"
What's the difference between dead babies and bowling balls?
...You can unload a truck of dead babies with a pitch fork.
I learned this joke on a blind date. True story.
"Honda = Boring, Suzuki = Wannabes, Yamaha = Poser, Ducati = Overated, BMW = Compensating, Aprilia = Insecure, Buell = BCIT business... go faKOffee." - PUREVIL
Fill the house with bees.
http://bcusedoil.com/Originally Posted by Land Roving
Drinking rum before 10 in the morning makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic!!
There are old riders and there are bold riders. There aren't any old, bold riders.
Ride safe folks.