Questions about Canada from Tourism Site
Results 1 to 3 of 3

Thread: Questions about Canada from Tourism Site

  1. #1
    Emtarkanderundrsgunderson Array Boone's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Chilliwack, BC
    '01 CBR929RR

    Questions about Canada from Tourism Site

    1. Q: I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plantsgrow? (UK)
    A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watchingthemdie.

    2. Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (USA)
    A: Depends how much you've been drinking.

    3. Q: I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto - can I follow therailroadtracks? (Sweden)
    A: Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water. . .

    4. Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada? (Sweden)
    A: So its true what they say about Swedes.

    5. Q: It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places tocontact for a stuffed Beaver. (Italy)
    A: Let's not touch this one.

    6. Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Canada? Can you send me alistof them in Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and Halifax? (UK)
    A: What did your last slave die of?

    7. Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada?(USA)
    A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe.Ca-na-dais that big country to your North . . . oh forget it. Sure, the hipporacingis every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come naked.

    8. Q: Which direction is North in Canada? (USA)
    A: Face south and then turn 90 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.

    9. Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (UK)
    A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

    10. Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
    A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, whichis... oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary, straight after the hip po races. Come naked.

    11. Q: Do you have perfume in Canada? (Germany)
    A: No, WE don't stink.

    12. Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth.Canyou tell me where I can sell it in Canada? (USA)
    A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

    13. Q: Can I wear high heels in Canada? (UK)
    A: You are an American politician, right?

    14. Q: Can you tell me the regions on British Columbia where the femalepopulation is smaller than the male population? (Italy)
    A: Yes, gay nightclubs.

    15. Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada? (USA)
    A: Only at Thanksgiving.

    17. Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all yearround? (Germany)
    A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter gatherers. Milk is illegal.

    18. Q: Please send a list of all doctors in Canada who can dispenserattlesnake serum. (USA)
    A: All Canadian rattle snakes are perfectly harmless, and can be safelyhandled and make good pets.

    19. Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada, but I forgetitsname. It's a kind of big horse with horns. (USA)
    A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by sprayingyourselfwith human urine before you go out walking.

    21. Q: I was in Canada in 1969 on R+R, and I want to contact the girl Idated while I was staying in Surrey, BC. Can you help? (USA)
    A: Yes, and you will still have to pay her by the hour.

    22. Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
    A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first.
    Do kindly reply back if you are interested and as you do you will be glad you do, you can reach us through our email address David Boone

  2. #2
    You gotta lean into it! Array InvisibleSoul's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Kawasaki Ninja Silver ZX1R Pocketbike (Matching ZX6R Stolen)
    I'm surprised there was nothing about igloos.

  3. #3
    Mah spoon is too big! Array Mikfit's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Van City

    Re: Questions about Canada from Tourism Site

    Originally posted by Boone

    3. Q: I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto - can I follow therailroadtracks? (Sweden)
    A: Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water. . .

    A friend of mine who worked at a Vancouver Hotel was once asked (by an American) regarding a potentially good DAY TRIP:

    "How far are them Niagra Falls?"

    not joking.....
    What do you mean what do I mean?

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts