I got this from another site...
If we can call a male cat a TOM and a female dog a BITCH, What do we call a male dog and a female cat?
Yeah, and why is an asteroid called an asteroid and a hemroid is called a hemroid?
yeah and if 7-11 is open 24-7 why is there locks on the doors
as i went to ST. Ives i meet a man with 7 wives, the 7 wives had 7 sacks, the 7 sacks had 7 cats, the 7 cats had 7 kittens; kittens, cats, sacks and wives how many people are going to St. Ives ??
Why do they call it "Gettin fixed" if it don't work after they're done? (If my dog could spoken, I swear that'd be what he would have said!.... Also, he thinks I'm a sonofabitch now!
How do you love somebody that doesn't believe in love?
why are there directions on shampoo bottles, and what happens if you don't follow them?
Why do bird owners always teach their birds to say, "What are you doing?"
Do you really think the damn bird cares what the hell I'm doing?
If it's against the law to drink and drive, than why do we need licenses to buy alcohol????
Indeed..and why are there parking lots at every bar.....most of the time really big ones too??
Why do they call it a freeway, when my taxes pay for it !?! And if you park on the parkway, you'll get hit. But you park in the driveway!
if a guy with no arms wears a sleeveless shirt, is it still a muscle shirt???
when a bald guy is washin his face, how does he know where to stop???
if u pull the wings off a fly, does it then become a walk???
Why is there a light in the fridge, but not the freezer?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point
to their ass when they ask where the bathroom is?
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you,but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
If quitters never win, & winners never quit, what fool came up with "Quit while you're ahead"?
What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?
STRESSED spelled backwards is DESSERTS
why run when you can walk?
or better yet, why walk when you can RIDE?
Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?
How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
If the "black box" flight recorder is never damaged during a plane
crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of that stuff?
Are children who act in rated 'R' movies allowed to see them?
If something "goes without saying," why do people still say it?
Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
if a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
If Americans throw rice at weddings, do the Chinese throw hamburgers?
If tomorrow is going to be twice as cold as it is today, and if today is 0 degrees, how cold will it be tomorrow?
Do we complain rose's have thorns or do we rejoice thorns have roses?
WHen it says "You are here" on a mall directory... HOW DO THEY KNOW????