67 ways to be annoying
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Thread: 67 ways to be annoying

  1. #1
    Je ne suis pas Francais Array nutcracker's Avatar
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    Apr 2002
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    67 ways to be annoying

    67 Ways To Be Annoying

    1- In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."

    2- Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."

    3- Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public
    consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeeep Bip..."

    4- If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while
    talking to others.

    5- Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.

    6- Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch
    paper, 99 copies.

    7- Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.

    8- Sniffle incessantly.

    9- Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.

    10- Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think."

    11- Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace."

    12- Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was
    a "real hoot."

    13- Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc:" them
    to your boss.

    14- Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people
    play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.

    15- Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with

    16- Wear a special hip holster for your remote control.

    17- Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing
    awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any

    18- Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your

    19- Give a play-by-play account of a persons every action in a nasal
    Howard Cosell voice.

    20- Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and
    insist to others that you "like it that way."

    21- Staple papers in the middle of the page.

    22- Ask 1-800 operators for dates.

    23- Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copyright

    24- Sew anti-theft detector strips into peoples backpacks.

    25- Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.

    26- Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon.

    27- Honk and wave to strangers.

    28- Dress only in clothes colored Hunters Orange.

    29- Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.

    30- Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of
    rental movies.

    31- Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their
    complimentary mints by the cash register.


    33- only type in lowercase.

    34- dont use any punctuation either

    35- Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole

    36- Pay for your dinner with pennies.

    37- Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.

    38- Repeat everything someone says, as a question.

    39- Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's

    40- Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?"
    "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now."

    41- Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.

    42- At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.

    43- As much as possible, skip rather than walk.

    44- Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.

    45- Pretend your computers mouse is a CB radio, and talk to it.

    46- Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of
    your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up," and

    47- Ask people what gender they are. When they answer, laugh hysterically.

    48- Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts
    back in the tray.

    49- Hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers brains, such as
    "Feliz Navidad", the Archies "Sugar" or the Mr. Rogers theme song.

    50- While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a

    51- Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.

    52- Change your name to "John Aaaaasmith" for the great glory of being
    first in the phone book, claim its a Hawaiian name, and demand that
    people pronounce each "a."

    53- Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see
    if they slow down.

    54- Chew on pens that you've borrowed.

    55- Title it "67 Ways to be Annoying" - but only put 55
    2010 can't affort a bike anymore
    2006 Husqvarna 610SM
    2004 VFR
    2003 R1
    2002 KTM LC4
    1998 ZX6-R
    I'd rather be scared to death than bored to death.

  2. #2
    living the dream Array BRETT's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    I dont even remember
    only the best

    Re: 67 ways to be annoying

    "that's what YOU think."

  3. #3
    that's hilarious!! i LOVE the lego thing. sooooo annoying!

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