13. Never take life too seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.
12. Life is sexually transmitted.
11. Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
9. Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to
use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
8. Some people are like Slinkies...not really good for anything, but you
still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.
7. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying
6. Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
5. All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention
4. Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a
substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
3. In the 60's people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world
is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
2. Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come
to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.
1. HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND!!!!!!!!!