Ok, so i saw this movie last night and figured i'd do a very half-assed review of it. I figured this is a movie that is mostly aimed at the BCSB community and there will be many of you wondering if it's worth seeing.
We got there early enough to catch all of the commercials and previews for upcoming movies. Since this is the first G-rated movie i have seen in a long-ass time, i was unprepared for the absolute crap that they'll turn into a movie and then run previews for. There's a new movie coming out called "Genius babies 2" or something like that. After seeing a trailer that just about made me puke with dizziness and sheer contempt, i saw a quick flash of the credits and noticed that Scott Baio is in it. Of course i yelled out "Fucken Scott Baio is in that shit!" I got a good laugh from the back of the theater for that one, but i wasn't joking. His name was on there! After another 20 minutes of commercials with slumber parties sponsored by Coke, the movie was about to begin.
Like any cinderella story, this one involves a super hot bitch that is rendered "ugly" by wearing a baseball cap, and then is suddenly beautiful when it's taken off.
The part of evil stepmother is played by Stifler's mom.
She shows up at the dance like this:
And charms the ever-lovin' shit out of this prince charming guy who she met in a chatroom. After a while of mysteriously finding an abandoned gazebo with fresh flowers and beautifully arranged lights, they dance to a band of mexican luchadors who appear out of nowhere.
Some geeky guy makes out with this super hot bitch and then she breaks his heart by being a stupid whore at school.
Paul Rodriguez plays a cook in the family diner and steals every scene he is in. He gives new hope to greasy, washed-up, unfunny, poor latin comedians everywhere who long for a time when they can make a 30-second bit part in a Hilary Duff movie.
Hilary Duff ends up with the star quarterback even after her emails to him are read aloud at school and she is devastated. She marches that tight little body into the boys' change room at school and is focused coz she doesn't pass by any mirrors to distract her from her mission of satisfying her insatiable thirst for cock.
So yeah, don't see this movie unless someone makes you go.