Insanity In The Workplace: A How To Guide
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  1. #1
    Je ne suis pas Francais Array nutcracker's Avatar
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    Apr 2002
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    Insanity In The Workplace: A How To Guide

    Insanity In The Workplace: A How To Guide

    How To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity In The Workplace.

    Page yourself over the intercom. (Don't disguise your voice.)

    Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits.

    Always wear them one day after your boss does. (This is especially
    effective if your boss is a different gender than you are.)

    Make up nicknames for all your coworkers and refer to them only by
    these names. "That's a good point, Sparky." "No, I'm sorry. I'm going
    to have to disagree with you there, Chachi."

    Send email to the rest of the company telling them what you're doing.
    For example "If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom."

    "Highlight" your shoes. Tell people that you haven't lost your shoes
    since you did this.

    While sitting at your desk, soak your fingers in "Palmolive."

    Put up mosquito netting around your cubicle.

    Put a chair facing a printer, sit there all day and tell people you're
    waiting for your document.

    Arrive at a meeting late, say you're sorry, but you didn't have time
    for lunch, and you're going to be nibbling during the meeting. During
    the meeting eat 5 entire raw potatoes.

    Insist that your e-mail address be

    Every time someone asks you to do something, ask them if they want
    fries with that.

    Send email to yourself engaging yourself in an intelligent debate
    about the direction of one of your company's products. Forward the
    mail to a co-worker and ask her to settle the disagreement.

    Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized chair

    Put your garbage can on your desk. Label it "IN."

    Determine how many cups of coffee is "too many."

    Develop an unnatural fear of staplers.
    2010 can't affort a bike anymore
    2006 Husqvarna 610SM
    2004 VFR
    2003 R1
    2002 KTM LC4
    1998 ZX6-R
    I'd rather be scared to death than bored to death.

  2. #2
    this is fukin hilarious

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