Friday funnies
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Thread: Friday funnies

  1. #1
    I do all my own stunts Array boarder's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    only 1 bike now, '02 gsxr750

    Friday funnies

    Nick the Dragon Slayer had a long-standing obsession to nuzzle the beautiful
    Queen's voluptuous breasts, but he knew the penalty for this would be death.

    One day he revealed his secret desire to his colleague, Horatio, the
    Physician, who was the King's chief doctor. Horatio the Physician Exclaimed
    that he could arrange for Nick the Dragon Slayer to satisfy his desire, but
    it would cost him 1,000 gold coins to arrange it. Without pause, Nick the
    Dragon Slayer readily agreed to the scheme.

    The next day, Horatio the Physician made a batch of itching powder and
    poured a little bit into the Queen's brassiere while she bathed. Soon after
    >she dressed, the itching commenced and grew intense. Upon being summoned to the Royal Chambers to address this incident, Horatio the Physician informed the King and Queen that only special saliva, if applied for four hours, would cure this type of itch, and that tests had shown that only the saliva of Nick the Dragon Slayer would work as the antidote to cure the itch.

    The King quickly summoned Nick the Dragon Slayer. Horatio the Physician then slipped Nick the Dragon Slayer the antidote for the itching powder, which he quickly put into his mouth, and for the next four hours Nick worked
    passionately on the Queen's voluptuous and magnificent *b*r*e*a*s*t*s*. The Queen's itching was eventually relieved, and Nick the Dragon Slayer left satisfied and touted as a hero.

    Upon returning to his chamber, Nick the Dragon Slayer found Horatio the
    Physician demanding his payment of 1,000 gold coins. With his obsession now
    satisfied, Nick the Dragon Slayer couldn't have cared less and, knowing that
    Horatio the Physician could never report this matter to the King, shooed him
    away with no payment made.

    The next day, Horatio the Physician slipped a massive dose of the same
    itching powder into the King's shorts. The King immediately summoned Nick
    the Dragon Slayer...

    The moral of the story - - Pay Your Bills.


    A beautiful, well endowed, young lady, goes to her
    local pet store in search of an exotic pet. As she
    looks about the store, she notices a box full of frogs.

    The sign says: "*S*e*x* Frogs! Only $20 each! Money Back
    Guarantee! (Comes with complete instructions)."
    The girl excitedly looks around to see if anybody's
    watching her and whispers softly to the man behind
    the counter, "I'll take one." The man packaged
    the frog and said, "Just follow the instructions

    The girl nods, grabs the box, and is quickly on her
    way home. As soon as she closes the door to her
    apartment, the girl takes out the instructions and
    reads them thoroughly, doing exactly what it says to do:

    Take a shower.
    2. Splash on some nice smelling perfume.
    3. Slip into a very *s*e*x*y* teddy.
    4. Crawl into bed and place the frog down on the bed.

    She then quickly gets into bed with the frog!
    and, to her surprise, nothing happens!

    The girl is totally frustrated and quite upset at
    this point. She rereads the instructions and notices
    at the bottom of the paper it says, "If you have any
    problems or questions, please call the pet store."
    So, the lady calls the pet store.

    The man says, "I had some complaints earlier today.
    I'll be right over."
    Within five minutes, the man is ringing her doorbell.

    The lady welcomes him in and says, "See, I've done
    everything according to the instructions and the
    damn thing just sits there."

    The man, looking very concerned, picks up the frog,
    stares directly into its eyes and sternly says:
    "Listen to me! I'm only going to show you how to do
    this one more time!"
    anyone wanna lend me a bike ?

  2. #2
    AAAAhahahaha...thats some funny stuff man...i needed that...this day seems to be draggin!

  3. #3
    Registered User Array
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    03 SV650S/DR350E
    LOL! Good ones!

    Last edited by dizzy; 10-15-2004 at 11:51 AM.
    RIP Julia, our shining light

  4. #4
    Hahaha...good stuff

  5. #5
    Born to be WILD Array Tmustang's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Port Coquitlam
    2002 Honda CBR 954RR
    good one
    Tmustang you are clear for take off

  6. #6
    Bushido Array Valoroursness's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Victoria B.C.
    The Dragon one is good!
    Only the strong survive.

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