Hot or Cold in Hell?
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Thread: Hot or Cold in Hell?

  1. #1
    :) you'll live longer Array rockshoxbiker's Avatar
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    Apr 2002

    Hot or Cold in Hell?

    The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.

    Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic(absorbs heat)?

    Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or somevariant.One student, however, wrote the following:
    First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

    As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.

    With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

    This gives two possibilities:

    1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

    2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

    So which is it?

    If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you, and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."


  2. #2
    Bushido Array Valoroursness's Avatar
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    Feb 2004
    Victoria B.C.
    I wonder if this was true.. It's Funny, however I am not certain of it's credibility.
    Only the strong survive.

  3. #3
    pronounced as-wee-pay Array effenay's Avatar
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    Jul 2003

    But probably not true

  4. #4
    Being an atheist, maybe I'll tell you when I find out.

  5. #5
    Quote Originally Posted by Valoroursness
    I wonder if this was true.. It's Funny, however I am not certain of it's credibility.
    <---- pulls out the "sterile 2X4" (a la Dr. Hibbert)

    *sigh* The ambiguity adds to it man. Not everything must be taken at face value.

  6. #6
    Registered User Array SpideRider's Avatar
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    Jul 2002
    Fraser Valley
    Funny, regardless of its truth or not.
    Cry in the dojo, laugh on the battlefield
    Sparring speed is a matter of simple physics:
    The height of your flight is inversely proportionate to the mass of your ass.

  7. #7
    It was old

  8. #8
    The slow guy behind you Array Brian's Avatar
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    May 2003
    New West
    '97 GSX-R 750
    Quote Originally Posted by JasonKidd
    It was old
    Old or not (I've read it before too) it's still funny as hell!

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