Kids say the darndest things...
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Thread: Kids say the darndest things...

  1. #1

    Kids say the darndest things...

    MELANIE (age 5) asked her Granny how old she was.
    Granny replied she was so old she didn't remember any more.
    Melanie said, "If you don't remember you must look in the back of your
    panties. Mine say five to six."

    STEVEN (age 3) hugged and kissed his Mom goodnight. "I love you so much,
    that when you die I'm going to bury you outside my bedroom window."

    JACK (age 3) was watching his Mom breast-feeding his new baby sister.
    After a while he asked: "Mom why have you got two? Is one for hot and
    one for cold milk?"

    BRITTANY (age 4) had an earache and wanted a painkiller. She tried in
    vain to take the lid off the bottle. Seeing her frustration, her Mom
    explained it was a childproof cap and she'd have to open it for her.
    Eyes wide with wonder, the little girl asked: "How does it know it's me?

    SUSAN (age 4) was drinking juice when she got the hiccups.
    "Please don't give me this juice again," she said, "It makes my teeth

    D I (age 4) stepped onto the bathroom scale and asked: "How much do I

    MARC (age 4) was engrossed in a young couple that were hugging and
    kissing in a restaurant.
    Without taking his eyes off them, he asked his dad: "Why is he
    whispering in her mouth?"

    CLINTON (age 5) was in his bedroom looking worried.
    When his Mom asked what was troubling him, he replied, "I don't know
    what'll happen with this bed when I get married. How will my wife fit

    JAMES (age 4) was listening to a Bible story.
    His dad read: "The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee
    out of the city but his wife looked back and was turned to salt."
    Concerned, James asked: "What happened to the flea?"

    TAMMY (age 4) was with her mother when they met an elderly, rather
    wrinkled woman her Mom knew.
    Tammy looked at her for awhile and then asked, "Why doesn't your skin
    fit your face?"

    The Sunday Sermon I will never forget....
    "Dear Lord," the minister began, with arms extended toward heaven and a
    rapturous look on his upturned face, "Without you, we are but dust."
    He would have continued but, at that moment, my very obedient daughter
    (who was listening!) leaned over to me and asked quite audibly in her
    shrill little girl voice, "Mom, what is butt dust?"

  2. #2
    Registered User Array SpideRider's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2002
    Fraser Valley
    Ahh, the innocence of youth.
    Cry in the dojo, laugh on the battlefield
    Sparring speed is a matter of simple physics:
    The height of your flight is inversely proportionate to the mass of your ass.

  3. #3
    contradiction incarnate Array slam's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    another great one
    nobody gets out alive

  4. #4
    Funny stuff.

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