Ten Resolutions You May Be Able to Keep in 2006
10. Read less.
9. Gain weight. Put on at least 30 pounds.
8. Stop exercising. Waste of time.
7. Watch more TV. You've been missing some good stuff.
6. Procrastinate more.
5. Drink. Drink some more.
4. Start being superstitious.
3. Spend more time at work.
2. Stop bringing lunch from home: You should eat out more.
and last but not least...
1. Take up a new habit: maybe smoking!