MORE DARWIN AWARDS ARE OUT!!!!!
Hard to believe, but another year has passed...For
those who don't know it, the Darwin Awards are awarded
every year to the person(s)who died (or almost died)
in the stupidest way, thus enhancing the gene pool by
And the nominees are:
NOMINEE No. 1: [San Jose Mercury News]:
An unidentified man, using a shotgun like a club to
break a former girlfriend's windshield, accidentally
shot himself to death when the gun discharged,
blowing a hole in his gut.
NOMINEE No. 2: [Kalamazoo Gazette]:
James Burns, 34, (a mechanic) of Alamo, Mich., was
killed in March as he was trying to repair what
police describe as a "farm type truck." Burns got a
friend to drive the truck on a highway while Burns
hung underneath so that he could ascertain the source
of a troubling noise. Burns' clothes caught on
something, however, and the other man found Burns
"wrapped in the drive shaft."
NOMINEE No. 3: [Hickory Daily Record]
Ken Charles Barger, 47, accidentally shot himself to
death in December in Newton, N.C. Awakening to the
sound of a ringing telephone beside his bed, he
reached for the phone but grabbed instead a Smith
Wesson .38 Special, which discharged when he drew it
to his ear.
NOMINEE No. 4: [UPI, Toronto]
Police said a lawyer demonstrating the safety of
windows in a downtown Toronto skyscraper crashed
through a pane with his shoulder and plunged 24
floors to his death. A police spokesman said Garry
Hoy, 39, fell into the courtyard of the Toronto
Dominion Bank Tower early Friday evening as he was
explaining the strength of the building's windows to
visiting law students. Hoy previously has conducted
demonstration of window strength according to police
reports. Peter Lawyers, managing partner of the firm
Holden Day Wilson, told the Toronto Sun newspaper
that Hoy was "one of the best and brightest" members
of the 200-man association.
NOMINEE No. 5: [Bloomburg News Service]
A terrible diet and room with no ventilation are being
blamed for the death of a man who was killed by his
own gas. There was no mark on his body but an autopsy
showed large amounts of methane gas in his system.
His diet had was just the right combination of foods.
It appears that the man died in his sleep. Had he
been outside or had his windows been opened, it
wouldn't have been fatal. But the man was shut up in
his near airtight bedroom. According to the article,
"He was a big man with a huge capacity for creating
this deadly gas." Three of the rescuers got sick and
one was hospitalized.
NOMINEE No. 6: [The News of the Weird]
Michael Anderson Godwin made news of the Weird
posthumously. He had spent several years awaiting
South Carolina's electric chair on a murder
conviction before having his sentence reduced to life
in prison. Whilst sitting on a metal toilet in his
cell and attempting to fix his small TV set, he bit
into a wire and was electrocuted.
NOMINEE NO. 7: ["The Indianapolis Star"]
A cigarette lighter may have triggered a fatal
explosion in Dunkirk, Indiana. A Jay County man using
a cigarette lighter to check the barrel of a muzzle
loader was killed Monday night when the weapon
discharged in his face, sheriff's investigators said.
Gregory David Pryor, 19, died in his parents' rural
Dunkirk home about 11:30 pm. Investigators said Pryor
was cleaning a 54-caliber muzzle loader that had not
been firing properly. He was using the lighter to
look into the barrel when the gunpowder ignited.
NOMINEE No. 8: [Reuters, Mississauga, Ontario]
A man cleaning a bird feeder on the balcony of his
condominium apartment in this Toronto suburb slipped
and fell 23 stories to his death. Stefan Macko,55,
was standing on a wheeled chair when the accident
occurred, said Inspector D'Arcy Honer of the Peel
regional police. "It appears the chair moved and he
went over the balcony," Honer said.
NOMINEE No.9: [Arkansas Democrat Gazette]
Two local men were seriously injured when their
pick-up truck left the road and struck a tree near
Cotton Patch on State Highway 38 early Monday morning.
Woodruff County Deputy Dovey Snyder reported the
accident shortly after midnight Monday. Thurston
Poole, 33, of Des Arc and Billy Ray Wallis,38, of
Little Rock are listed in serious condition at
Baptist Medical Center. The accident occurred as the
two men were returning to Des Arc after a frog
gigging trip. On an overcast Sunday night, Poole's
pick-up truck headlights malfunctioned. The two men
concluded that the headlight fuse on the older model
truck had burned out. As a replacement fuse was not
available, Wallis noticed that the .22 caliber bullet
from his pistol fit perfectly into the fuse box next
to the steering wheel column. Upon inserting the
bullet, the headlights again began to operate
properly and the two men proceeded east-bound toward
the White River bridge. After traveling approximately
20 miles and just before crossing the river, the
bullet apparently overheated, discharged an! d struck
Poole in the right testicle. The
vehicle swerved sharply to the right exiting the
pavement and striking a tree. Poole suffered only
minor cuts and abrasions from the accident, but will
require surgery to repair the other wound. Wallis
sustained a broken clavicle and was treated and
released. "Thank God weren't on that bridge when
Thurston shot his balls off or we might both be dead"
Stated Wallis. "I've been a trooper for ten years in
this part of the world, but this is a first for me. I
can't believe that those two would admit how this
accident happened," said Snyder.
Upon being notified of the wreck, Lavinia, Poole's
wife, asked how many frogs the boys had caught and
did anyone get them from the truck. (Way to go, Lavinia!)