War, Newfoundland style
Results 1 to 5 of 5

Thread: War, Newfoundland style

  1. #1
    Registered User Array scpower's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    just sold it, looking for a new one...

    War, Newfoundland style

    President George Bush was in the Oval Office wondering which country to invade next, when his telephone rang.

    "Hallo, President Bush" a heavily accented voice said. "This is
    Archie, up 'ere at the Harp Seal Pub in Badger's Cove,
    Newfoundland, Canada ey? I am callin' to tells ya dat we are officially declaring war on youey!"

    "Well Archie," George replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is your army?"

    "Right now," said Archie, after a moments calculation "there is
    myself, me cousin Harold, me next-door-neighbor Mick, and the whole
    dart team from thee pub. That makes eight!"

    George paused. "I must tell you Archie, that I have one million men
    in my army waiting to move on my command."

    "Holy jeez," said Archie. "I'll have ta call ya back.

    Sure enough, the next day, Archie called again. "Mr. Bush, the war is still on! We have managed to get us some equipment."

    "And what equipment would that be Archie?", George asked.

    "Well sir, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Harry's farm tractor."

    President Bush sighed. "I must tell you Archie, that I have 16,000
    tanks and 14,000 armoured personnel carriers. Also I've increased
    my army to one and a half million since we last spoke."

    "Lard T'underin' Jaysus, bye", said Archie, "I'll be getting back
    to ya."

    Sure enough, Archie rang again the next day. "President Bush, the
    war is still on! We have managed to git ourselves airborne! We up
    an' modified Harrigan's ultra-light wit a couple of shotguns in the
    cockpit, and four byes from the Legion have joined us as well!"

    George was silent for a minute then cleared his throat. "I must
    tell you, Archie that I have 10,000 bombers and 20,000 fighter
    planes. My military complex is surrounded by laser-guided,
    surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last spoke, I've
    increased my army to TWO MILLION!"

    "Jeysus, Mary and Joseph," said Archie,"I'll have ta call youse

    Sure enough, Archie called again the next day. "President Bush! I
    am sorry to have to tell you dat we have had to call off dis 'ere

    "I'm sorry to hear that" said George. "Why the sudden change of

    "Well, sir," said Archie, "we've all sat ourselves down and had a
    long chat over a bunch of pints, and come to realize dat dere's no
    way we can feed two million prisoners."

  2. #2
    100%GOON Array Pitdogboy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    dirt pig
    hehehehe...Now hows bout a full size of your Avatar?
    "Shoot to thrill play to kill
    Too many women too many pills"


  3. #3
    Rogue Rider
    ^ +1

  4. #4
    Registered User Array SpideRider's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2002
    Fraser Valley
    +2 on the avatar increase.
    Cry in the dojo, laugh on the battlefield
    Sparring speed is a matter of simple physics:
    The height of your flight is inversely proportionate to the mass of your ass.

  5. #5
    Lee RideFar Array elevation's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    White Rock
    Ninja 1000

    +3 for the avatar!!!

    Come on.... It's monday.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts