An Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years. Upon her return her Father cussed her. "Where have ye been all this time? Why did ye
not write to us, not even a line? Why didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old Mother thru?

The girl, crying, replied, "Sniff, sniff....Dad....I became a prostitute...."

"Ye what!!? Out of here, ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a disgrace to this Catholic family."

"OK, Dad-- as ye wish. I just came back to give mum this luxurious furcoat, title deed to a ten bedroom mansion plus a $5 million
savingscertificate. For me little brother, this gold Rolex. And for ye Daddy, the sparkling new Mercedes limited edition
convertible that's parked outside plus a membership to the country club....(she takes a breath).... and an invitation for ye all to spend New Years Eve
on board my new yacht in the Riviera and... ."

"Now what was it ye said ye had become?" says Dad.

Girl, crying again, "Sniff, sniff....a prostitute Dad! Sniff, sniff."

"Oh! Be Jesus! Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye said a Protestant". Come here and give yer old Dad a hug."