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RS 03.08.74 ~ 02.11.06
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388 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Just thought you should know...

I regret facing my friends these days trying to force a smile and pretending that I am doing ok.

I hate going home at night knowing I am there alone.

I hate that my life is backwards now. We had so many plans and all of that is messed up and gone.

Getting up, getting dressed, breathing, all of it....is torture. Especially knowing what could have been if you were still around.

But please know, that NOT FOR ONE SECOND, in all of my regrets, do I regret you riding. I am so glad you had that passion.

The way you walked away that morning, the smile on your face, knowing how sunny it was out and the friends you were going riding with. I will keep that memory in my heart forever.

I love you Rick

Rachel
 

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Hang in there Rachel. I sold you guys that bike. Rick Came into Dueck alot to hang with Mally so i saw him all the time.
 

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Blue Power Ranger
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498 Posts
Wow Rachel,

I've never met you, but your posts are a raw and gut wrenching reminder of the risks we take, and the tragedies that occur to some.

Although I can never begin to imagine what you are going through, I "feel" your pain in my gut. And my heart and prayers go out to you.

Don't stop writing your feelings out on this forum. Release them for yourself and for others to see.

Take care,

Ty
 

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Life is Good!
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336 Posts
No regrets is the right thing to say Rachel, although Rick left us early..... he left doing something he loved and believed in. That is all you can pretty much ask for, knowing he lived a good life and knowing that he left behind good memories for the people that loved him.

Give it time, I know this is hard but it will get better... Rick would not want you to be sad everyday, he would want you to have a passion for life as he had a passion for riding.

Hang in there, thanks for the words..... your words may help someone lay off the throttle and live to ride another day.

It is worth it, we are blessed to be here... slow down and lets all go home safe so we can ride another day.
 

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banned user
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I'm glad you are a part of the community Rachel. Your a special person to share this with others.
 
G

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There's really nothing I can say here that I haven't already said to you in person.Most of us here will never truly understand what you are dealing with Rachel but, I know I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.You constantly show Rick love, respect and honour and I'm positive he'd be really pleased with all the wonderful things you've done with him in mind.I guarantee he's tremendously proud of the strength you show the world every single day.One thing I've maybe never told you......is that your posts here on BCSB always impress me and show an enormous amount of class.

If ever I'm lucky enough to find a wife who loves me this much I hope she's exactly 100 percent just like you!
 

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What's the speed of dark?
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163 Posts
While your son won't grow up with his Dad, he has an amazing Mom.
 

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Happy Camper
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2,698 Posts
Time and laughter heals all wounds. You'll be a stronger person for it in the end.
...and you're not alone. You have friends, and most importantly, a lovely child that you created!
 

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Rachel I often wonder why I was so blessed to have been so close with Rick for just a short time. I can't even imagine what my life would be like had I never met him. I'm so thankful for the outcome of my friendship with him. I look forward to watching Coen grow up. I feel because of Rick I have become closer to you and Graham. You know that I'm always there for you and your family and whatever you need.
 

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333 Posts
brought i tear to my eye, there are still many things in life to hold on to as well as all the loving memories of your husband...take care and be well
 

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Ride the winds of change
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1,994 Posts
Rachel

I have read many of your post. Thank you for voicing your emotions. You are a strong person. Thank you for not slighting motorcycles, for many of us its a passion like it probably was with Rick.

Hold your head up high !!

I always have troubles mentally this time of year with the gloom.

Get out there and do the things you love. Do your hobbies to take your mind off things.

All the best in this season of the year and please keep posting up, many people appreciate your feelings.

Thank You Scooter
 

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8,785 Posts
Your the best Rachel. Rick lives on thru your son Coen. He will never be without his little riding buddies, Dakar will be here soon and I'm sure they will be a big part of the motorcycling community. I promise you your son will understand the thrill of riding and why his father did it. I'll be part of motorcycling for a long time I'm not going anywhere.

Thanks for being there for Holly so much , your a true lady.
 

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Addicted to two wheels
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2,615 Posts
Thank you for sharing Rachel. That brought tears to my eyes. Be strong, not only for you but that awesome little son. You can be sure Rick is pretty proud.
 
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Lest we forget

Rick's wife, your messages are an inspiration to those of us who love to ride. I lost two friends three years ago and still feel the pain. What many of us fail to acknowledge is how an injury or fatality will affect the lives of our loved ones. I have spoken to my family about this so that they understand that my choice of riding motorcycles is not about selfishness but it is about having a passion that makes me appreciate life. If you have never ridden a motorcycle you can never understand.
Your messages are helping more than you know.
 

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Sorry for your loss Rachel , looked at your post this morning and it moved in a way that had me thinking and feeling all day.I too lost the love of my life over 14 years ago ,and while we struggle , scream and cry we go forward time is somewhat of a healer but not an eraser for the love that is eternal .I 'am glad to have known that love ,while crying and smiling at the same time even for a short while .Your a great lady , stay strong for those around you, thanks Rachel.
 

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RS 03.08.74 ~ 02.11.06
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388 Posts
Discussion Starter · #18 · (Edited)
Thank you all for your encouraging and supportive comments. I love to post here on BCSB because I know I will get the support I need. A lot of people that don't ride want to blame motorcycles for rick's death. Unfortunalty they don't understand that riding was as an imporant a process to rick as breathing. He was obsessed.

Thank you again.:rockon
 

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Meet you on Sedna!
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275 Posts
Rachel, I echo the sentiments of the others.

Having families of our own just underscores how precious the balance of life can be. My thoughts go out to you in your day to day challenges... hang in there and look to all the great stuff you still have to be thankful for.

I think your presence here on BCSB is great for everyone involved, and if you get some form of support too, all the better. Not to mention your input and insight is always a breath of fresh air with all the clowns in here anyways. ;)
 

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I've never met you Rachel but I feel your pain. My mom died when I was in grade 7 and whether you believe it or not, time does heal.

Hang in there.

Paul
 
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