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RS 03.08.74 ~ 02.11.06
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As most of you know, my beloved husband died on February 11, 2006 while riding the S2S highway. I also rode our R1 , but have decided that I will not get on another bike as far as I am caring for our baby Coen ( who is now 6 months ).

I can only asume, that as Coen grows up, and sees that his Daddy passionalty loved motorcycles and died doing the sport he loved, that he too may be curious by the sport.

So... anyone... How do I address this ? Rick wanted Coen to start dirt biking when he was 3... Do I do this ? Do I stop him from riding if he wants to ????

I know I am the mother and must make the ultimate decision and am being a bit neurotic since he is only 6 months old, but I want to hear from you guys out there and value your oppinions.

Rachel
 

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rain? whats that!
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If its something Rick would have wanted, I'd probably at least introduce him to little bikes. The kid may end up not liking riding anyhow, or he may love it.
 

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V Lister
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Rick rode, you ride. and most likely your son will one day ride. i am a 3rd generation of riders in my family, and as of a couple of years ago my son now rides. i too felt guilty and apprehensive at first teaching him to ride, thinking about all the what ifs. but as time went i saw the same fire in his eyes as i have always had. i feel better knowing he is starting young, and learning the basic principles of riding, so when its his time to get on the streets, he will have greater knowledge of what this lifestyle is about. for me its not about what you ride, its about ''the ride''. ,,,, i say pass the torch down the line, as i'm sure Rick would have wanted it that way.:)
 

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I think 4-6 yo = BMX bike, 6-9mountain bike, 9-11 honda 50cc dirt, 12-14=70-100cc dirt, 14-16=250cc dirt, 16-19 motorcycle safety course, 19 and on street, dirt, but I would say if he loves it, get him onto a track (dirt or street)...just my humble opinion.
 

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I think a proper BMX bike as slowzuki might be the best start. But it's defintetly a thought provoking question.

I think it's more a personal choice that you have to make, and one that you're already well aware of the cons of. On the other hand, people get hit by buses and die from brain tumors all the time, so I'd say if you're comfortable with it, then let it be in the spirit of your husband.

I never even met him, and I still have that image of him and Coen laying together on the carpet. It must be nice knowing you still have some of him around in your son. All the best to you two.
 

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Hi Rachel,

There is only one established certainty: motorcycles are much more dangerous than cars for the same distance driven.

I would neither encourage nor discourage your child to ride. It’s also impossible to know if your child will take to motorcycles simply because Dad did. Treat him with love and kindness and expose him to lots of meritable activities and thoughts. He will find his way.

I feel for your loss,

Chum
 

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No one says you have to put him on a bike at 3, I would say let him come to you. He may come to you at 3 asking, he may come to you at 15 asking...he may never ask. Untill then dont stress about it. Let life unfold as it may, when and if he wants to ride he will ask you and at that very moment the answer may be alot more clear to you then it would be now.
 

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High Five
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My son is six, and it's funny how many things I thought I needed to get him started on early. If he doesn't want to do it, he won't do it ( see ice hockey )

Anyway, I wouldn't put him (my son) on a dirtbike now, there's no way he could handle it, maybe in a few years if he wants to try.
 

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Three hour tour guide
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As a father of teenagers I would echo both these comments.

Don't stress about it now.. your child will, in due time, decide for themselves what they want to be involved in. Just support them as best you can in whatever that may be. Don't push or try to dissuade them from any activity, they're innately smarter than you may think and will have a good idea of what they want to do and will be good at by the time they need to know.


No one says you have to put him on a bike at 3, I would say let him come to you. He may come to you at 3 asking, he may come to you at 15 asking...he may never ask. Untill then dont stress about it. Let life unfold as it may, when and if he wants to ride he will ask you and at that very moment the answer may be alot more clear to you then it would be now.
Hi Rachel,

There is only one established certainty: motorcycles are much more dangerous than cars for the same distance driven.

I would neither encourage nor discourage your child to ride. It’s also impossible to know if your child will take to motorcycles simply because Dad did. Treat him with love and kindness and expose him to lots of meritable activities and thoughts. He will find his way.

I feel for your loss,

Chum
 

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Obi-Wan Newbie
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Hi Rachel, first of all my condolences!! I feel what you feel and the thought of something happening to my own kids is unbearable. But the way I see it is that we were all kids and teenagers once and I am sure that our parents felt the same way when we first learned to ride a bike, then getting our driver's license. As much as we want to protect our children it is hard to keep them away from everything. I would set a good example of what to do and bear in mind all the things that we are not suppose to do. Teach them when they are young about what is good and how to enjoy the moment. I believe we are all here to live our lives to the fullest. And how ever long we are here the truth is you only live once. I wish you all the best and you have the largest family in the world and that is all of us in the motorcycle world!! If you ever need an ear to bend just give me a jingle!!
 

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Echoed once again and if by chance your child wants to bike, steer him the right way so that he learns the way Rick would have wanted.. Safely and wisely.

My heart is with you, god bless Rick
 

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Been there, Wrecked that!
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I would have to say you should expose him to everything and he'll choose the path that is right for him.

I myself am facing a similar dilemma with my son. It is hard for me to think of him riding and myself having to face what my parents did when I had my near fatal accident 3yrs ago. If he does decide to ride I will support him 100%, though I will emphasize the upsides to track vs. street riding!
 

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Happy Camper
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I think the choice is easy. No motorbikes. As he gets older and can understand things more, he'll realize how motorbikes changed his family and the heartache they caused his mother.

When he's young, only you have the power to prevent him from getting on a motorbike...let's face it, even a 15-year old isn't going to have enough money to buy a bike.

If you raise him with some discipline and lots of love and communication, then you absolutely have the power to prevent him from getting on one.

When he's a man, if you raise him to love you and respect you, he'll know better than to cause you worry and grief by getting on a bike. There's so much more to life than just riding on a bike. His world is not going to be limited just because he hasn't ridden one. It's not being selfish when you love someone enough to prevent them from doing dangerous things.

I'm sorry for your loss.
 

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Gear Driven Cams
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Wow, Alex, that's kinda harsh. Both Mom and Dad rode. You think once the kid finds this out that they won't want to at least try riding too?

What did your parents say when you got a bike? Were they supportive?

If you get the kid on a bike early, they'll be better off in the long run. Learning bike skills on a dirt bike and/or on a dirt track, they'll gain skills that many of us can never learn because we started too late. If they eventually migrate to the street, they will be much better equipped to deal with riding.

Just my $0.02, and keep in mind that my dad rode, my mom only as a passenger, and I haven't had any close friends or relatives injured on a bike. Yet.
 

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X-nasty
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I was riding my 50cc Honda Mini Trail when I was 4 years old. I think that it would be a shame to not allow your son to enjoy one of the things that will tie him to his father.

You have many a few years of healing before he will be able to ride and 16 years before he will be allowed on the street. Many things can change between then and now.


I am sorry for your loss, however,if your husband were to have been killed by a driver in a crosswalk, would you let your son cross the road? I know it is not the same though.
 

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Happy Camper
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Spike said:
Wow, Alex, that's kinda harsh. Both Mom and Dad rode. You think once the kid finds this out that they won't want to at least try riding too?

What did your parents say when you got a bike? Were they supportive?

If you get the kid on a bike early, they'll be better off in the long run. Learning bike skills on a dirt bike and/or on a dirt track, they'll gain skills that many of us can never learn because we started too late. If they eventually migrate to the street, they will be much better equipped to deal with riding.

Just my $0.02, and keep in mind that my dad rode, my mom only as a passenger, and I haven't had any close friends or relatives injured on a bike. Yet.
I realize my post was a little unusual for being a rider. Rachel was asking for opinions and I posted mine. I'm taking into consideration the emotional factors involved in such a tremendous loss as Rachel has had to endure. I realize that there's a lot of dangers out there, but why go through the stress of worrying about your child getting hurt on a motorbike if you don't have to?

Sure, the boy might want to ride a bike when he finds out, but as a parent, Rachel has the power to decide what her child will get to do or not.

Since you asked, my parents never wanted me to get a bike even though I did want to. Out of respect for them I waited until I was older (in my 30s) to get a bike. My mom is a worry-wart and I don't like making her worry. I'm glad I did wait, because I realize now that my IQ drops in an inverse relation to the speed of the vehicles that I drive. In my teens and 20s I was in a series of car accidents that made me appreciate the safety of a cage.

Rob, I appreciate your opinion and I hope your family and friends keep riding safely.

In any case, this is a big decision and perhaps it's a little early. You have many years ahead to make that decision Rachel.

Edit: This reminded me that when I was 12 my dad actually got me an old broken-down rototiller-powered minibike. I got it running and was only allowed to ride it in our small backyard. Eventually, I killed the grass where ever I rode it, making our yard look like a mini oval dirt track. Mom was not happy. :) It was fun and topped out at about 15km/hr. That's as far as my parents allowed me to go on bikes. It probably did get me hooked on the bike feeling, but my parents drew the line at that.
 

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BlackScorpion said:
I realize my post was a little unusual for being a rider. Rachel was asking for opinions and I posted mine. I'm taking into consideration the emotional factors involved in such a tremendous loss as Rachel has had to endure. I realize that there's a lot of dangers out there, but why go through the stress of worrying about your child getting hurt on a motorbike if you don't have to?

Sure, the boy might want to ride a bike when he finds out, but as a parent, Rachel has the power to decide what her child will get to do or not.

Since you asked, my parents never wanted me to get a bike even though I did want to. Out of respect for them I waited until I was older (in my 30s) to get a bike. My mom is a worry-wart and I don't like making her worry. I'm glad I did wait, because I realize now that my IQ drops in an inverse relation to the speed of the vehicles that I drive. In my teens and 20s I was in a series of car accidents that made me appreciate the safety of a cage.

Rob, I appreciate your opinion and I hope your family and friends keep riding safely.

In any case, this is a big decision and perhaps it's a little early. You have many years ahead to make that decision Rachel.

Edit: This reminded me that when I was 12 my dad actually got me an old broken-down rototiller-powered minibike. I got it running and was only allowed to ride it in our small backyard. Eventually, I killed the grass where ever I rode it, making our yard look like a mini oval dirt track. Mom was not happy. :) It was fun and topped out at about 15km/hr. That's as far as my parents allowed me to go on bikes. It probably did get me hooked on the bike feeling, but my parents drew the line at that.
My mom (had no dad) didn't let me get a bike. So I got a paper route and saved up for a 50cc dirt bike at the age of 12...at 16 I had a 350 kawi tripple, at 17 a GS 400, at 18 a GS 550, at 19 an RD LC 350 twostroke, and then she held my hand in VGH ICU when i almost died...but it never stopped me. I got back on a bike within 3 months of being able to walk again. So really, her choice is contingent at best. All she can do is love and support him and make sure whatever he gets "into" he does so safely. However, he might decide bikes are stupid in the end and get into 4 by 4 ing...
 

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the earlier he learns to ride the better for when he turns 16 and doesn't want to listen to you about why not to ride.
 
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